Life Goes On and On and On...

I have not blogged in a little bit. I am not as diligent as my husband is about blogging, even though it was my idea. Anyway, to update you with what is going on with us...

J is seeing a therapist. She is delightful to talk to about what is going on with J. We have hope once again. She has given J a homework assignment, which is to reflect. That means he has to repeat back to me what he thinks I meant, not what I said. He has been doing pretty well so I begin to wonder if I was right about selective listening lol.. now that he has to stop and listen, he understands what I am saying. *accusing stare*

I had a bad day yesterday because I want to be able to support my family but it is so hard to get things going. I can't even get a regular retail job and I have a Bachelor's Degree!! However, after a nice, HOT shower and some dinner, I felt a lot better. Today we went to the regular doctor's office to get J help for his other ailments like his back and his allergies. We have an appointment with the back doctor (not the chiropractor) and will be getting J's blood work done. So, we are in a limbo, but next week, we go see the psychiatrist finally!

That's all for now. =]

The Sun is Rising!

I am trying not to get my hopes up, but it really seems like the therapist we saw the other day understands J and Asperger's Syndrome. I have felt like we got the ball rolling before, but that went NO WHERE! The other people we have seen never really seemed to try to build a trust with us, or they did and it was just superficial. J's new therapist is awesome! She is a fun person to talk to and we can have an actual conversation with her about AS. The nurse practitioner we saw before was reading a paragraph about AS when we were trying to discuss it with her. Anyway, I am hoping we finally found someone (or some two.. the other being the psychiatrist who has had experience with Aspies) that is understanding and genuinely wants to help. YAY!!

Surrounded By Idiots

I thought about something today. An Aspie needs a good support system. He/she needs a person or people to encourage them to pursue whatever he or she wants to pursue. Earlier today, I was discussing J's AS on a forum. It occurred to me that J had a career he wanted to pursue in fashion design. However, his "mom" talked him out of it. Now, he sews costumes. I can't help but wonder if he would be successful in a career of being a fashion (or costume) designer had he been encouraged (and not discouraged) to go after his dream. Now, we will never know. I only wish he had someone with half a brain (or heart for that matter!) for a mother instead of what he wound up with. Then maybe instead of blaming J for not having a career, she would be proud of what he accomplished. At least J is no longer surrounded by idiots and has a real support system now in me and our friends.

We want to go to the zoo!

Who knows what today will bring? I asked Jareth (6 months) if he wanted to go to the zoo and he got all excited and screamed. He doesn't know what the zoo means but he wants to go! LOL... the problem is trying to get J out of the house to go to the zoo. I understand he hates to leave the house but this is one of those things he has to work on. The world does not revolve around J. A parent's world revolves around the child(ren).

Inspiring Outlook

I must say, I really needed to hear something like this..

On facebook,

Vin Diesel

Ten years ago I was a bouncer, a security guard at a nightclub. I can remember articles in New York at the time, boasting that the nightclub was the safest place to be… if only subways, streets, and restaurants had that level of security and protecti...on, that assurance that you could enjoy yourself without worrying about your safety. New York was different then.

“Who you are now, is not who you will be 10 yrs from now… who you will be 10 yrs from now... is up to YOU.”

Thanks, Vin! You have lifted my spirits!

The Uphill Battle with AS, Money and Inadequacy.

My optimism is wavering. I have been trying for months to get a decent job. In this economy, I know that my family is not the only one struggling. However, it does nothing for my confidence. I apply at places that have training programs for college graduates only to get emails saying I did not qualify. Oh, okay. That makes sense. Right. But, anyway, I can't help but feel inadequate. I am supposed to be the bread winner for my family but I can't make any money if no one hires me. I have started to think that going back to school to finish my degree was the wrong move. I truly hope not. All I can think is that if I never went back to school, I'd still be working a low-paying hourly job, but I'd still have money coming in. I know that even if I can find a decent job, I will need to get J back into the doctor's office and make them become advocates for us to get him on disability. I just can't believe that they were the only ones around here that could help and they turned us away last time.

Feeling Like A Single Mom

In many ways, I feel like a single mom. I have 2 kids to take care of (my husband and my son). It is going to be extremely hard with only 1 income, but I am hoping to go back to the doctor and go through a more extensive process of getting J diagnosed with AS. Then, we will be applying for disability once again. I can't do this alone, and the government should not make it so someone who probably has low-functioning Asperger's Syndrome cannot get assistance. It is absolutely ridiculous.